Woman seated at a table holding a plate of tabbouleh, with a neutral-colored abstract painting in the background.

The death of a parent is an indescribable experience that no one can truly prepare you for. Regardless of the relationship, timing, or circumstances of the loss, it leaves an enduring impact that only those who have gone through it can fully comprehend. So much so, that my friends and I lightheartedly call all of us out there The Dead Parents Club - a club nobody wants to be a part of but once you’re in you find a wealth of compassion, camaraderie, and care from those already there. Grief manifests differently for everyone, but it’s always there as an undercurrent, often swelling to the surface when least expected, triggered by small and varied reminders of our loved ones—a song, a smell, an object, a chance encounter…or even a meal.

Inspired by these reflections, I have embarked on a project I’m calling “The Dead Parents Potluck,” which explores memory and grief through my own way of connecting with my dead dad: food. I photograph my subjects in their home with a dish that evokes memories of the parent they had lost. Through storytelling, tears, laughter, and shared meals, we find catharsis in our collective mourning—a heartbreaking, yet beautiful journey that mirrored the complexities of grief itself.

This project is ongoing, and I am seeking Dead Parents Club members who live in the London area to participate. Please drop me a message at hello@stephaniepollak.com to express your interest.

This series was a finalist in the 2024 AOP Awards: Food & Drink Category

Man sitting at a table eating in a dimly lit room with wooden decor and African statue

Elderly couple with cakes at a table with lace cloth.

Woman sitting on a couch with a plate of peeled potatoes on a table.

Woman sitting on a couch eating dumplings, with wall art in the background.

Man sitting in garden, child in white dress running past, trees in background.

PERSONAL PROJECT

The Dead Parents Potluck